HOW ARE YOUR ATTITUDES?(Taken from Callerlink 156 February 2003)
Jeff Garbutt

Below are some comments I have heard over the years that I absolutely detest.

Comment: "Oh we tried that ourselves a few years ago, it didn't work for us, so it won't work for you."

My thoughts: So what? Just because it didn't work before, doesn't mean it won't work now. And what did they do wrong to make it fail? Just because it didn't work for one group of people at one time, doesn't mean it won't work for someone else at another time.

Comment: "This is my area, (or my night) no-one else can start a club in this area (or night)."

My thoughts: No-one owns square dancing. Square dancing owns us. I particularly like the following line from the movie "Crocodile Dundee" which sums it up: "It's a bit like two fleas fighting over the ownership of a dog, when it is really the dog that owns the fleas".

Comment: "Why should our club help yours - you're the opposition".

My thoughts: Opposition? What in? I didn't know I was running a completely different activity to you. The real opposition is other dance forms, other sporting activities, television, and other hobbies. We should all be working together to promote square dancing. Sure we have to look after our own clubs - but we won't have any clubs if we don't put the movement first.

Comment: "So you finally decided to come back."

My thoughts: I have often heard a club official say just such a statement to dancers who haven't been for a while. And I have also watched those same clubs lose members. I wonder why? Dancers do have to miss a few nights sometimes it's unavoidable. Maybe a family member is sick and they need to help out. Maybe they need to re-charge their batteries. Maybe one of them has been working late and is just too tired to come to the dance. These dancers are already feeling bad enough about missing dances, and are feeling a little bit apprehensive and guilty before they walk through the door. So what happens, they get bombarded with more guilt. Guess what - you are just about to lose those dancers - not just to your club - but to the movement. It doesn't matter that you may have said it jokingly - the impact is the same. Always welcome your prodigal dancers with respect.

The above are not hypothetical comments. They are based on real comments that I have heard over the years. I might not have the exact wording as used, but I have conveyed the meanings. And - considering that such comments are really only "windows" into attitudes - it doesn't surprise me that we have problems in some areas.